Vacations, Walking, Appointments, Regatta oh my!

Life has been busy.

What, really, you ask? Life is busy with three kids?

I feel like this is how I'm starting lots of blog posts recently.

Since I last posted the girls had their 18/19 month assessment at the PPP on July 25th.  And they got assessed at 18/19 so we don't have to go back until they are 3 year olds!!!! You won't believe how excited I was to finally get the "they are behaving like their actual age, not their adjusted age"

After the appointment we went on a mini vacation with my parents and in-laws. The kids loved it and so did we! On the second day Gwen decided that all she needed to walk was an empty 4L bottle of water in her hand and all the family to see her. Since then she hasn't stopped!

While on vacation Matthew and I marked our 10 year dating anniversary on the 27th. We didn't do too much because we were running around enjoying our vacation so yesterday we went to lunch with the girls to acknowledge it.

three little monkeys on the top bunk 

Also during the vacation we were able to spend some alone with Rhys and drive to the Aviation museum and swing by the silent witness memorial. Rhys loved the special attention and being the big boy doing big boy things, but he also insisted that we buy somethings for the girls while we were there.

Captain calling 

flight simulator 

Look how big the gun is dad!

Looking at the different planes and "all the mechanical pieces"

plane going though the museum 

silent witness

Daddy and Rhys taking in the memorial 

We also went to the touch tank in Terra Nova Park. Avery tried to climb into it she loved it that much

Avery is excited!

Trying to get into the tank!!!!

Touching it all 

Mom look what I did!!!!

After the vacation there have been a bunch of appointments. Avery doesn't have to see ENT for 9 months. Gwen's AVT is happy with her word count. They will be getting their speech therapy appointments in the next few months and next week we get the big cardio appointment to see if Avery is to stay off her meds and to see if the pressures in Gwen's heart have lowered like expected.

This past week we also got to go down to the Royal St. John's Regatta. The kids loved it and this is the girls second one (third if we count their time in-utero)

Regatta 2013 (Avery & Gwen) 

Regatta 2012 (Gwen & Avery) 

I know there is more I want to talk about but I have two baby girls who are climbing all over me! Back to life

18 month appointment & sadness

The girls had their 18 month needles today, and having to talk about all the doctors and health issues is I have to admit depressing.

They have come so far, but having to relive everything that has happened in the last 6-12 months...

June 2012

We are getting close to Gwen's 1 year diagnoses for ANSD. The more I think about AN, the sadder I get recently. I just wish I knew she was going to do well with her HA. Just wish she would develop language well enough, and hear well enough to be the best she can be. 

Gwen - July 2013

I also worry about Avery's paralyzed vocal cord, and people not understanding them. The girls are still random stopped, and they get looks. Avery always gets looks when she gets excited in talking. 

Avery - July 2013

I don't want people looking at them, signaling them out. I know it already happens with the fact that they are twins. But I wish that they wouldn't look because of Gwen's HA, or the looks when Avery talks. 

They are fine.

Avery - July 2013

They are both dealing with disabilities.

Gwen - July 2013

But I refuse to treat them as disabled. 

Avery - July 2013

But I can still be sad.

I will still have days that I blame myself. 

I know it isn't logical, and I know that I didn't do this to them. I know that the alternative to it all is worse. 

If Avery didn't have her PDA surgery when she did, she would have bleed out into her lungs and died. Simple as that. We couldn't have waited for her to be bigger, to wait for the space to be bigger, and for it to be less likely for the nerve to be damaged. 

Avery - Jan 2012

If Gwen wasn't put on a ventilator, she would have died too. We almost lost her several times, too many times to count and we would have if she wasn't ventilated. It damaged her hearing. Her early delivery, low birth weight, jaundice, antibiotic use all damaged her auditory nerve and were all because of being born early. 

Gwen - Jan 2012

These are the realities of the girls. I have to deal with this, somehow. And I will. 

It's just taking sometime.